What is Existential therapy?
Existential therapy is rooted in the idea that we struggle as a consequence of the very fact that we exist.
We have agency, the power for make choices, but there are limits to what we can change about our lives.
One of the pioneers of Existential therapy defined four ultimate consequences of existing: isolation, freedom, meaninglessness and death.
Many people – a cynic might say most people – cope with these ”givens of existence” by ignoring them.
Our society encourages us to repress our fears and our doubts by burying them in positive thinking.
Indeed, many kinds of therapy promise to turn negative thoughts into happy thoughts.
When should I use Existential therapy?
If you are seeking therapy, chances are you have been woken up to the fact that sometimes life is just not good.
Trying to evade your negative thoughts is not a long term solution. Instead, an existential therapist will help you learn how to accept the consequences of existing and how to thrive in spite of them.
A former client once described existential therapy as an act of malicious compliance with life.
Existential therapy is about learning to live well, learning to be your authentic self and learning to meet life’s challenges head on.
How is it different to other types of therapy?
This is a form of therapy that seeks to validate your lived experience.
The pretentious academic way of putting it is that it takes a phenomenological approach. What that means is that existential therapy recognises your lived experience as being your reality.
Figuring out what may or may not have “really” happened is less important than understanding how you feel about what you experienced. If I encounter homophobia, for example, it hurts me regardless of whether they were “just joking” or not.
In particular, I have found working phenomenologically to be effective with my neurodivergent clients.
Who is Existential therapy for?
In my professional experience, Existential therapy often works well for people who have encountered adversity because of who they are.
Many of my clients have been neurodivergent, queer, disabled, chronically ill and BAME. These are people who are often not afforded the privilege of blissful ignorance.
I have also found it resonates with people who have experienced traumatic life events.
Existential therapy is good for anyone who is sick and tired of being told to look on the bright side of life.
What should I expect at an Existential therapy session?
Existential therapy is very much a talking therapy. For clients who cannot cope without a rigid structure of guidelines this might not be the right approach.
There are no ten step programs here. Each client is a unique individual and will receive a uniquely individual course of therapy here.
It is also not a therapy which promises quick results. Existential therapy does not claim that you will be “cured” of anxiety in six weeks.
What it does promise is that is it possible for you to grow, over time, into the best version of yourself.
